Why iron when you can look like a million bucks straight out of the box? This Brooks Brothers button-down says: “I have style, I have ambition… and I definitely don’t have time for laundry.”

• Size L: Fits humans, not robots.

• Pattern: Windowpane plaid – fancy enough for the office, casual enough for pretending you work from home.

• Colors: Blue & Red – because subtlety is overrated.

• Non-Iron: More time for coffee, memes, and plotting world domination.

Buy it before your closet files a complaint.