Look, I’ll be honest with ya, I really need someone to take this Abe “Kid Twist” Reles card off my hands before things get… let’s say “complicated.” This is from Historic Autographs: The Mob, Card #98, featuring the guy who once solved problems with a friendly shove… usually out a window.

Now, I ain’t saying Abe himself is leaning over my shoulder, but let’s just say I’ve been hearing footsteps in the hallway and my pet goldfish is suddenly swimming with anxiety. I was told, “Move the card, or else…” and judging by the smell of marinara outside my house, I think they mean it.

Why should you buy it?

• Because it’ll look amazing in your collection.

• Because it’s history you can hold without actually joining the mob.

• Because Abe “Kid Twist” doesn’t take “maybe later” as an answer.

Do the right thing—make an offer and make my problems disappear. If not for me… do it for the goldfish.