This listing is for one glorious card of Kaori Misaka of Kanon (W120-020), the cool older-sis type who could teach a brick wall how to have emotional depth—and yet here she is, trapped in my living room, wedged between NASCAR hero cards and a box of expired Buckeye donuts from Sandusky.

I'm gonna be real with you. I need to sell this card faster than you can say “it’s snowing again in Cleveland.” Not because it's ultra mega hyper foiled sparkle-chrome™—nah, this is just a solid, good-lookin' anime gal from Key All Stars, who’s been through more melodrama than a soap opera in a wind tunnel.

Why should you buy this?

• Because she deserves better than being stored in a binder between Joe Graf Jr. and an anime sticker of a raccoon holding a sword.

• Because I'm dangerously close to trading her to my cousin for a gas station slushie and a story about Akron that ends with "and that's why we don't go back."

• Because I need someone—anyone—to help me prove my collecting isn't a cry for help (even though it 100% is).

If you’ve ever felt feelings, loved anime, or been stuck in a Walmart parking lot in Toledo during a wind advisory—this card’s for you. Let Kaori heal your heart. Or at least hold it together with those cold, anime-girl eyes that say, “I understand you, even though you don’t understand yourself.”

Please. Buy this card before I use it as a coaster again.
Ships lovingly. Or available for pickup in Ohio, where dreams go to hibernate.