Black metal typing / reading / document stand, like the ones you'd see in typing pools or sitting on secretary desks in old movies. Has some weight to it, so also effective for hitting Todd, the annoying accountant guy that keeps coming over and trying to look down your shirt. "I told HR, but they didn't do anything," you can say as you stand over Todd's inert body. "Thinks he's the Harvey Weinstein of spreadsheets or something."