From the Director of Welcome to the N.H.K.

She can’t give it away!

Did you hear about Yamada? You the chick: pretty face, nice body, wears a plaid skirt every day? Well, I heard from my lab partner that “Little Miss Virgin” wants to have sex with a hundred different dudes before she graduates. I’m not even kidding! That hot mess totally thinks she can devirginize a hundred guys even though she’s never even French-kissed! She must be in heat. I even saw her flirting with that dork Kosuda at lunch today. No joke. She was smiling and winking and grinding her lady bumps up against his shoulder. It was pathetic! I mean – don’t get me wrong – I’d probably let her sex me up and stuff, but she’d have to practice first. I like my ladies experienced, and she can’t even give it away.

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